Friday, August 1, 2008

lost hope. lost love. broken promises. empty bottles...

fuck it.

my heart has grown cold.
i let her get the best of me.
i always let them get the best of me.
while they get the best of me.
they bring the worst out in me.
lonely late lunches?
focus on a brand new day?
melodic rhyme patterns that only clear
my thoughts for a few moments.
poison is as poison does.
parasites feedings off each others hate for love.
...instead of embracing it.
it's always easier to push somebody away.
it's always easier to build a wall.
chances are...nobody wants to scale it.
which in most cases...i would blast straight through it.
but I've lost the strength. and I'm not you.
my heart has grown cold.
7 minutes off my life for every cigarette i have smoked.
1 pack of cigarettes a day.
thats at least 2 1/2 hours of life.
shattered like the glass of a broken frame.
split in half like my cell phone.
and even if i wanted to hear your voice.
now i can't. which saves me the pain of having to deal with somebody so careless.
maybe I'm careless.
or i care too much.
sick and tired of moving.
sick and tired of being here.
sick and tired of giving everything i can.
not tired enough to fall asleep.
interesting how fake people really are.
interesting how one can be so blinded by it.
my heart has grown cold.
conversations of "what if..."
one-sided relationship of "if only..."
two-faced feelings of "trust me..."
three-times the pain of "whatever..."
four-shots to burn the throat and realize what's true.
which happens to be nothing more than how i really feel.
except more like the color of aqua blue.
it only looks right sometimes...
just like you know it's true love,
when you get stabbed in the back.
the ink holds the secret.s.
the paint takes to long to dry.
the booze isn't strong enough...
and neither is my fist.
jack hammer.
my heart has grown cold.
i walk to a steady beat.
it has turned into a skipping record.
since when was it wrong to feel?
I'm sorry I'm not a robot.
the silence screams louder than a daily dose of x-ray vision.
when you assume things, it doesn't make an ass out of u. and me.
it just makes an ass out of you.
and makes me feel like i should shut up.
because somehow agreeing to disagree is not allowed.
opinions never matter...
and freedom of speech is no longer accepted.
it's been too lonely...for too long.
and love is just a numbers game
my heart has grown cold.


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